Six Reasons to Have Sex Every Week

Studies show that regular sex (with all due precautions taken) provides a host of surprising health benefits.

Sex is good for adults. Indulging on a regular basis—at least once a week—is even better. Research links sex (with all safer-sex precautions taken) to an astonishing array of physiological benefits, from longevity to pain relief. Many studies don't address whether the health bonus comes from the act itself or from the corresponding emotional intimacy, but the bottom line is that getting physical has some great side effects—especially for women. Here are six ways that sex boosts your health:

1. It Fights Colds and Flu. Sexual intercourse once or twice a week raises the body's level of the immune-boosting antibody immunoglobin A by a third, according to research at Wilkes University in Pennsylvania.

2. It's a Beauty Treatment. In a study at the Royal Edinburgh Hospital in Scotland, a panel of judges viewed participants through a one-way mirror and guessed their ages. Those who looked seven to 12 years younger than their age (labeled "superyoung") were also enjoying lots of sex—four times a week, on average. OK, maybe they were having so much fun because they looked young. But it's likely the sex was helping, researchers say. One reason is that it raises a woman's estrogen level, which helps make hair shiny and skin supple.

3. It Burns Calories. A little over four calories a minute, or the equivalent of four Hershey's kisses in a half hour of love. Think of it as part of your weekly exercise regime, and burn, baby, burn.

4. Yes, Honey, I Have a Headache. For a woman a migraine might actually be a reason for making love rather than avoiding intercourse: the increase in endorphins and corticosteroids during arousal and orgasm is analgesic.

5. It Promotes Regular Menstrual Cycles. A series of studies by behavioral endocrinologist Winnifred Cutler and colleagues at Columbia and Stanford universities found that women who have intercourse at least weekly (except during their period) cycle more regularly than abstainers or the sporadically active. (Related research found that lesbian lovemaking also smoothes out menstrual cycles.) Cutler argues that intimacy is essential, not orgasms: "Regular exposure to a loving partner has extraordinary effects on health and well-being.

6. It Can Prevent Accidents. Women use the muscles of the pelvic floor to stem the flow of urine. As they age, they need to keep these strong to avoid peeing accidentally. The same muscles are exercised during intercourse, and as with all muscle-building programs, the benefits require consistency.

And if you're too tired to have sex, check out our By the Numbers on napping for tips on getting a little extra shut-eye during the day.

© 2007 Newsweek, Inc.

Time For A Quickie!

Great sex technique - we seem to have become obsessed by it! There are probably thousands of books offering detailed explanations of ways to make love to your partner. But what about spontaneity? Where's that gone? What about the pleasures of the impromptu quickie? You're both horny, there's a raw urgency in the air, and you need it NOW!

Some women are afraid to let their partner know that they'd like a quickie. Supposing he misinterprets it and thinks you just want a quick shag that can be over and done within next to no time because you can't be bothered with the 'real thing'? The truth is, if you're horny and lusting for him, wanting a quickie will just show how much you still fancy him on a physical basis. You wouldn't feel irked at being desperately wanted by the bloke you fancy most, would you?

Sex serves many purposes and variation is no bad thing. One purpose is the reinforcement of that private bond which exists only between the two of you; something nobody else can share in. For this reason, having a quickie in a 'forbidden' situation can actually strengthen the relationship. When everybody is in full swing at the party, a couple that go outside and urgently make love have a secret that's theirs alone.

The excitement of being found out is also frequently linked with quickie sex. Having a quick romp in a semi-public place (such as behind the garage at the above mentioned party) can be highly stimulating. The feeling of 'naughtiness' often leads to intense arousal, culminating in delicious sex that's equally as good as the sex we'd ordinarily have in our comfortable beds with plenty of foreplay.

The term 'sex-positions' takes on a whole new meaning with quickie sex and couples often find themselves in positions that they'd never have otherwise experimented with. Old pieces of furniture, a wall, a washing machine or anything else that happens to be close by comes into its own when no-frills sex is on the menu.

One or both partners are usually partially dressed, something which in itself can be very arousing. Being held up against a wall with one breast outside your bra, your knickers around your knees and trying not to kick those litter bins for fear of attracting unwanted attention.... well, it could just as easily be a fantasy!

There's no right time or place for a quickie. Only your imagination can limit where and when. If you really want it, you'll find a place or situation that will be suitable for a bout of urgent sex. The kitchen table, the garden shed, or even a toilet seat will do. Just keep one thing in mind - no matter how desperate you are, it really isn't a good idea to subject unwitting by-passers to your amorous frolics. There are plenty of exhibitionists around, but we aren't all voyeurs! Happy bonking!


About the Author
Sharon grew up in East London but moved to Norway at the age of 19, returning to England in 1998. She now lives in Cheshire with her partner and two of her three children. Besides writing, she is currently studying Social Science with The Open University, runs a web site where women in the UK can meet other women for platonic friendship (www.friendsyourway.co.uk), potters in her garden, reads and generally tries to enjoy life. Sharon can be contacted at s.jacobsen@doodlebugmedia.co.uk

What Men Wish Women Knew

What Men Wish Women Knew

What do men wish women knew? That depends on the kind of man. We'll look at the three stages men grow through as they evolve spiritually as lovers. At each stage, men want something different from women.

1. "My way or the highway." You may recognize this attitude, or maybe your man has actually said these words to you. Some men want a woman to be obedient, and that's that. We'll call this kind of man a "me-man," because his priority is getting his own way, being king of the castle.

2. "Let's share our feelings and be fair." When a man grows beyond his need to dominate a relationship, then he is careful to divide the pie evenly. He agrees to do the dishes on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday and you agree do them on Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday. He takes the children to school in the morning, and you pick them up in the afternoon. We'll call this kind of man a "50/50 man" because his priorities include equality, independence, and sharing.

3. "Let's open our hearts, surrender to love, and give our deepest gifts." When a man grows beyond his need to be in charge and his need to create safety, then he has become a "heart-true man." The priority in his life is no longer about self-centered achievement. Nor is his priority to create a comfortable home and a relationship centered on fairness. Instead, like an artist learning to open and express his deepest heart, his priority is to live as love and give his deepest gift. He wants to be with a woman who is willing to surrender, as he has, to the force of divine or sacred love. And this kind of openness can be risky business.

A 50/50 man wants a woman who is independent and can stand on her own two feet. He doesn't want to always be responsible for her, emotionally or financially, but expects her to be able to take care of herself. He wants "space" to live his own life, and he is more than happy to give her space to live hers. This results in a modern, 50/50 style of relationship, in which two independent people share a life together out of choice rather than neediness. Although better than a relationship of co-dependence or abuse, this 50/50 relationship soon begins to feel shallow and empty of passion, almost like a business relationship, although it is fair and safe.

A heart-true man doesn't want a woman who depends on him. He also doesn't want a woman who stands separate, heart-guarded, and independent. He wants a woman who has grown enough to surrender her boundaries of safety, allowing her heart to open and be absolutely ravished to its depth by love--sexually and in everyday life. Although she can easily stand by herself, her heart yearns for more than the self-sufficiency she has achieved. Her enjoyment of heart-oneness is greater than her need for heart-safety. Her bliss in communion is greater than her need for deliberate communication. Her living art is to be free, surrendered open as her true power, the flow of infinite love. Dependent neediness and independent self-responsibility were only stages on the way to this utter heart-fullness. She no longer needs a man's love, and she no longer needs to give herself love, because now she is learning to open and live as love. She is learning to breathe love with every breath and offer love through every gesture. No longer waiting for a White Knight or her own success to save her, her artful practice is to live as a blessing force of love, with or without her man.

Criticism

1. A me-man doesn't like to be criticized. No matter what he is doing, he wants his woman's support. Even if she has a good idea, he can't receive it unless he convinces himself that it was his idea.

2. A 50/50 man respects his woman's ideas and gives them as much weight as his own. If they disagree about something, he is very willing to meet her half way. This often results in a mutual compromise, so that neither partner lives true to their deepest heart desire, but at least they honor each other's opinions.

3. A heart-true man knows that his life feels shallow unless he acts in alignment with his deepest purpose. He cherishes his woman's criticism--he realizes that in many ways her intuition is far deeper than his own--but in the end he takes full responsibility for his decisions. If his woman suggests something that changes his perspective, then he makes a new decision. But he never compromises his heart's deepest truth in order to please his woman or "go along" with her. He knows that if he gives up his heart's true decision to follow his woman's, then he will blame her if she is wrong and feel disempowered if she is right, having denied himself the opportunity to act from his deep heart and grow from his mistakes. By listening carefully to his woman and then taking total responsibility for his actions, he is free to offer her love unencumbered by resentment.

The Masculine Mission 1. A me-man uses his woman to fill the voids of his life. When he is not working, watching TV, playing golf, or reading the newspaper, he is willing to "tolerate" his woman enough to get what he needs from her.

2. A 50/50 man is willing to spend time shopping and chatting with his woman, just as she is willing to watch football games and violent action movies with him. Sometimes he listens to her talking even though he is bored and uninterested. After all, he wants to be fair, and what she has to say is every bit as important as what he has to say. He is careful to set aside his current project and spend enough time with his woman so she doesn't complain, even though deep down he may begin to resent her for distracting him from his sense of purpose.

3. A heart-true man's priority is to open in love and give his deepest gift, just as he wants his woman to do, too. He doesn't require that she sit through a violent movie if she has to close her heart to handle it, and he doesn't want to be required to sit through a conversation if he has to fake his interest. Rather than blab about the day, there are times when he would rather sit in silence and gaze deeply into his woman's eyes, or touch her with tenderness, or ravish her with loving passion. A heart-true man wants to be with his woman without distraction, closure, or impatience. He spends his workday acting in alignment with his deepest purpose--financial, artistic, political, or spiritual--so that when he is with his woman he can offer his love undividedly and completely; he is with her wholeheartedly. She can receive his total presence, and he can receive her abundant radiance. He wants his woman to understand that even though she may be the most important person in his life, his life's mission is not necessarily centered around, nor dependent on, their relationship.

By David Deidahttp://www.consciousloving.com/cgi-bin/resources.pl?id=35 Copyright © 1998, PLEXUS & David Deida. All Rights Reserved.

Amy's Better love and Sex Tutorial

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.